For us to bear with.

They have Friday Night Lights rerun in the morning. (i think). By they, I mean Star World. By (I think) I mean Im not sure as I find myself sleeping downstairs and on the way to my room, I passed by the TV room and saw or rather heard Coach Taylor saying "So, what are we going to do now?" so it might be just a dream as I am really pining for moree FNL. Oh wait. There is a way to prove that I'm not delusional enough to actually dream about FNL just because I miss watching it. Oh, SHOOT. There isn't any, because Astro View only lists down shows that air from 6 am to 12 pm. Im pretty sure I saw it in between the time and not after 6 or even before 12. But then again, there's no proof except for the Guide button on the remote and Im too lazy to click it.

I'm supposed to be studying and everyone in my house thinks I am but the truth is, I'm just wasting time till 12.45 to catch Private Practice. I missed the first half of the show because I was at my aunt's house so it's revengeeeee now. I am also eating tons of rambutans that I saw looking at me invitingly in the kitchen earlier. You could almost hear them say "Come here. Have a bit and you'll be looking for more". I think I read somewhere that rambutan is bad for your health if taken excessively but what does it matter? Eating a lot and not exercising is bad for your health too, but I still am glued do it. Going online when you're supposed to study for your exam is bad too, yet here I am. Who's keeping track,right?

I need to see a brain expert for I'm sure something is wrong with my brain. I try and try and try to read and make it stay on my mind but the simple truth is, I just can't. Yet, yetttttt, I find myself glancing at the clock every 2 1/2 minutes counting down the moments till Private Practice. Its just like someone sets my mind to only pay attention on things that aren't study related. I'm crossing my finger and hoping I won't fall asleep before PP starts like what happened yesterday while I was waiting for Grey's Anatomy. I am keeping my eyes wide open and even considering putting vix under my eyes to keep me from dozin off. A theory proven by me when I was in Standard 6 and find it hard to stay awake listening to the lecturer babbling about self determination, studying smart and of course, Success.

Also, I'm thinking of going bald. My hair irritates me. It's thick, it's wild, unmanageable, and it's already below shoulder length. I keep tying it but it never fails to fall off and annoy me with the strands tickling my face while I'm deep in concentration. I have forgotten to remind my father to buy my facial wash and for that I have to live with pimples all over my face. I miss my facial wash. The thing with it is it's always out of stock. It's not good for my skin type as it's actually for oily skin but I just love how fresh my face feels whenever I use it. And, it also helps me to get rid of stubborn pimples and blackheads which I have, a lotttt. Anyone generous enough to buy it for me? It's called Loreal Pure ZOne Deep Exfiolating Gel Wash and it can be found on any leading pharmacies. YEAH RIGHT. Like I know anyone generous. No offense

I am giving way too much useless information and yet it's only 12.25 am. Another 20minutes to PP. I shall go and force myself studying, then later indulge in my dessert that is Private Practice a.k.a Eye Candy Pete Wilder a.k.a Tim Daly who is 52 y/o but like I said before, who's keeping track?

Ah, signing off.
Taa. darlings.

have some imagination

this is how excited I get around books

are you hungry?

the zombie is here

BYE BYE

where did it all went?

M Y N A M E I S A T I Q A H

I wish I'm artistic, or poetic. I long to be creative, perhaps even funny for then I wouldn't have to spend 30 minutes on this page before getting an idea of what to write. And I still don't. Have any idea of what to write. Which is why I'm telling you this.

OH MAN, I'M ALL FUCKED UP

let's live in the land of dooom, where all of us are failure, so we won't feel insecure.

i'm ending this with something which isn't mine ;

What a good way to spend a Saturday.

I gave my sister rm30 and in exchange, I get to use her laptop. Which sounds actually like a good deal right? Considering its been a long time since I went online. The saddening part however was, that while I was thinking it's a good bargain, Aunty Ella came and brought the laptop which was finally repaired. Ah, regrets regrets.

I am thrilled that my father has a meeting tonight. Because that means I won't have to see Journey to the center of the Earth today and instead watch Grey's Anatomy, Dirty Sexy Money and Private Practice. Oh, and I'm thrilled that my sister is going out, even if it means spending my 30, and to think she still hasn't paid the other rm30 she borrowed. She's a crazy bitch since she finished her exam that day. Seriously, you wouldn't stand a minute being with her. She keeps screaming and screaming. When I asked her why can't she just stop screaming? Why does she have to scream? She answered me with ; "Dude, screaming is sooo me". Sigh.

I want to buy Smart boys and Fast Girls - rm 26.19
Perfect You - rm 36.90

it's all in Kinokuniya. and I'm going there tomorrow. Yippee!! Oooooh, I also viewed the PP's insider's website just now. Pete and Add is going to kiss on ep 6 and 7. Wohoooo!!

I finished my maths homework, unbelieveable righttt? :) Now now, stop complimenting me. HAHAHA.

Seriously doh, read Smart Boys and Fast Girls's excerpt right this instance. It got me gripped.



Goodbye, and Fatin. Definitely, Let's. Let's put a lot of excerpts on our blog, that depends on how often I get to go online though.


I so hate you, TIQA.

i'm breaking hearts and painting them in black.

AS IF. oh hell, hail the queen. How long has it been? Well, before you start crying you heart out, let me entertain you and give you gifts of your heart desire. Life suchaaaaaaaa bitch, don't you agree? I'm stressing out. I'm stressing out while I haven't even started studying yet. So imagine how bad it would be if I DO start studying. Can't you just feel the pain? Yes, I feel the sympathy. Thanks for much gratitude. FUCKK. What the hell am I talking about? You know what I want? I want to get out from this life. I don't want to go shopping or watch movies or hell, even read books. I'm sick of this life. I'm sick of myself. I want to wake up in the morning and not look at myself in the mirror. I want to wake up in the morning and realise that I'm the smartest of them all. But you really want to know what I want? I want to hide, hide and never come out.
I can't find any reason for me to like me, so how can I expect others to.


The truth about truth? It hurts, so we lie. Don't, please don't. Whatever it is, tell me the truth. I want to know it, even if I know I can't take it. even if I'd take it to heart and even if it haunts me every night, the reason for me not able to sleep. I want to know it, I need to know it. I always need a reality check, or I'll lose myself. So pleaseeeeeeeeee, tellllllll me. Yes, it breaks my heart, it doesn't make me stronger. BUT TIME AFTER TIME, i'll get used to it. or maybe i'd lose cotrol and fall down on my knees.


so break my heart and leave me all alone.
i need you.


TIQA.